Has returning to the office made you more anxious and less productive? You're not alone
Has returning to the office made you more anxious and less productive? You're not alone The return to the office can be a bellwether for anxiety. Giving up the benefits of working from home — more time spent with family, less time keeping up appearances — can be daunting, but it doesn't have to be permanent, says The Guyliner Justin Myers, The Guyliner For some, it's already begun – swivel chairs creak once more, passive-aggressive notes sprout in communal kitchens, and long dormant printers whir. For those who spent peak-pandemic working from home, the return to the office is on. Covid, and its lockdowns, saw us focus on R-values and deadlines, everything dependent on numbers aligning, so it can be hard to grasp the emotional upheaval of returning to this normal-lite version of life before the virus. Nobody's in the same headspace. Some came in the entire time, some longed from afar to swipe their security pass over the hallowed gate, and others aren't quite sure how to feel. After yonks of solitary working and video calling, many have forgotten how to be in an office. It's easy to readjust your monitor; recalibrating your office persona is less straightforward.
Continuous menace of the pandemic aside, working from home revealed certain benefits we may be reluctant to give up. WFH setups varied greatly – some employees conducted Zoom calls from their orangery, while others jostled for space next to their partner on the sofa – but according to a study commissioned by networking site LinkedIn, 20 per cent of men have opted to quit their job rather than return to the office full-time, with 39 per cent saying their mental health improved thanks to working from home. You would think, with homeworking all but the norm during the pandemic, old attitudes might fall away, but 41 per cent of men said there's still stigma around WFH, with some holding onto the belief that those going into the office would be favoured by their boss. Perhaps the biggest sticking point over homeworking is work-life balance versus career ambition. This battle predates the pandemic: most industries have long claimed that if you want to succeed, you must put the hours in, go above and beyond, make sacrifices. Witness any magazine profile of a CEO or entrepreneur, with 4 a.m. starts doing squats and tipping back wheatgrass shots, before a 14-hour day in HQ. It's little wonder another 41 per cent of men reckon WFH could impact their career growth. Presenteeism was always a huge problem, from coming into work ill to avoid being accused of having 'man-flu' to logging on at 6 a.m. to flag they're at their desk. This can lead to anxiety for men who cannot sit welded to their workstations, even though many surveys suggest more actual work is being done at home than in an office – although perhaps these are attempts to compensate for long-held prejudices that homeworking means one-finger typing with one hand and knocking back negronis with the other. In your pyjamas.
The debate around homeworking has become binary and hostile. Avowed office workers versus WFH devotees obliterates nuance, which is a shame, because WFH isn't exactly a shirk, and enjoying the office doesn't make you a simp to management. The pandemic has alerted us to previously "acceptable" working practices that workers are reluctant to slip back into – unpaid overtime, long commutes, unmanageable workloads, volatile management styles, etc. More dads found themselves more involved with frontline parenting than before, juggling homeschooling during lockdown, now school runs, and after-school activities, which would otherwise have happened way before they got home. The New York Times reports some bosses in the U.S. may see WFH as a 'bonus' and want to claw back value by adjusting downward the salaries of homeworkers; whether this gains traction remains to be seen but Darain Faraz, director of brand marketing at LinkedIn, reckons the pandemic is forcing businesses to reconsider traditional working patterns. "Pre-covid, five days a week in the office was the norm and suggesting a few days working from home to 'avoid the commute' or 'have more time with the kids' would have raised eyebrows," he says. "As we transition back into the workplace, I hope businesses will continue to evolve how they accommodate parents: allowing flexibility for pickups, drop-offs and sickness, no matter if it clashes with a 'priority' presentation." As the lines between work and home have continued to blur, it's clear something's got to give, and bosses need to lead the way. "Being constantly logged on can have a negative impact on productivity and many businesses are coming up with innovative ways to make sure staff are having some downtime, such as company-wide days off or no-meeting days," says Faraz.
It can be hard to remember the positives of office working. Tech saved our skins, but there's little denying quick work chats are easier in person. There's a different energy to collaboration: you can observe body language, de-escalate tricky situations, find solutions you didn't know you needed, all while wringing out your rooibos teabag in the breakout area. The bonding experience of office chatter – even dreaded "banter" – should not be dismissed. For every worker that hates a boss breathing down their neck or the banality of "How was your weekend?", there's someone craving leadership and personal interaction. Some men have longed for the thinking time a commute provides. Indeed, 44 per cent of men said they'd prefer to work in an office full-time, citing a desire to be around colleagues and feeling more productive and successful in a workplace.
But anxieties lurk. Further research from LinkedIn, whose learning courses include advice on honing confident communication skills in the workplace, reveals 86 per cent of men admit they're out of practice when it comes to office life, and 38 per cent reckon their small-talk skills have dwindled. This is a bigger deal than it sounds. "Small talk builds trust and a sense of belonging crucial to a team functioning at its best," says workplace psychologist Anjula Mutanda. "You may be fantastic at your job but without strong interpersonal skills, you'll likely struggle to make personal connections key to succeeding in an office environment."
If your small talk is rusty, Mutanda has advice for oiling the cogs of conversation. It starts with actually listening. "Resist the urge to interrupt with your own anecdotes, and use cues like nodding, smiling, and saying something like, 'I hear what you're saying'. This creates an atmosphere of collaboration, and builds trust."
To up your confidence, try opening with lighter subjects before going too deep. It can be as simple as asking what they've been watching on TV, Mutanda says – finding common ground soon gets a wider circle chatting. Body language is key too, so no hunched shoulders or slumping at your desk. "Assuming an upright posture helps you look and feel more open and approachable," says Mutanda, "and holding someone's gaze assures others you're paying attention and enables them to feel connected". If all else fails, crack a smile – not only is it reassuring to others, it's a great stress reliever, apparently. That explains a lot – my smiles are synced with Halley's comet. If you feel like anxiety might get the better of you, Mutanda suggests adopting the traffic light method to help manage ups and downs. On green days, you're good to go, free of anxiety. Amber days, where you might feel unsettled or a little flat, try taking yourself for a walk, finding time to be alone, and taking slow breaths or getting a glass of water to help calm you. And on the red days? "Reach out to a trusted colleague and ask for help, or a coffee catchup. Put time in the diary to explain what's worrying or stressing you, and work out an action plan to help rebalance the load." Which is where your small talk skills kick in.
Many men are embarrassed by being anxious about returning to the office, but it's a great opportunity to make yourself heard. There'll never be a better time to change the way we work, so long as we can cut through the conflicting interests and the noise around it. The grab for power to control change will likely long outlast any trace of the pandemic, but no employer worth their salt will want unhappy workers who'll soon look for more accommodating roles elsewhere. Everything must start somewhere, perhaps it starts with you. Small talk is scary, but speaking up is essential. Ask for more, see where it takes you.
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