Putin Agrees to Negotiate with Musk over Ownership of Trump
MOSCOW (The Borowitz Report)—Vladimir Putin has entered into negotiations with Elon Musk over the ownership of Donald J. Trump, the Kremlin confirmed on Tuesday. Those negotiations, however, are proving contentious, as the Russian president is arguing that, having fully owned Trump between 2017 and 2021, he is entitled to a majority stake now. For his part, Musk claims that he purchased Trump outright by spending nearly $300 million on his 2024 campaign. In one heated exchange, Musk reportedly told the Russian leader, “You’re being greedy, Vlad—you already own Tulsi.” TBR Question of the Day: Who owns Trump the most? Leave your comment below:Join the Resistance: Subscribe to The Borowitz Report Today. |
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