Trump with his new Attorney General and two other associates. (Davidoff Studios/Getty Images)
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In what experts are calling one of the most remarkable comebacks for a convicted sex offender in recent memory, on Friday Donald J. Trump announced that he was replacing Attorney General Pam Bondi with Ghislaine Maxwell.
Explaining his decision, Trump said, "Pam said there’s a client list, and Ghislaine said there isn't. So I have decided Ghislaine would be better at this job than Pam."
In another stunning reversal of fortune, Trump announced that Bondi would be taking Maxwell’s place in prison, adding, “I wish her well.”
He said he was confident that Maxwell would receive speedy confirmation by Senate Republicans, noting, “If they confirmed Hegseth they’ll confirm anyone.”
British rider Chris Froome launched one of his blistering mountain attacks to win the Criterium du Dauphine race for the second time, clinching the eighth stage to take the yellow jersey. from Articles | Mail Online http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/othersports/article-3123660/Chris-Froome-sends-strong-message-rivals-storms-win-Criterium-du-Dauphine-second-time.html?ITO=1490&ns_mchannel=rss&ns_campaign=1490
Periods are normal, but kids pointing them out in their sketches is something else. Australian woman Penny Rohleder shared a photo of her son's drawing on the Facebook page of blogger Constance Hall on Jul. 25, which well, says it all. SEE ALSO: James Corden tests out gymnastics class for his son and is instantly showed up by children "I don't know whether to be proud or embarrassed that my 5 year old son knows this," Rohleder wrote. "Julian drew a family portrait. I said 'What's that red bit on me?' And he replied, real casual, 'That's your period.'" Well, at least he knows. To give further context, Rohleder revealed she had pulmonary embolism in October 2016, and was put on blood thinning treatment which makes her periods "very, very bad," she explained to the Daily Mail . Read more... More about Australia , Parenting , Culture , Motherhood , and Periods from Mashable http://mashable.com/2017/07/31/period-mo...
Imagine having a laugh so infectious, even animals join in on the fun. Taken at what looks to be a kind of farming expo, this interviewee's laugh is so contagious, it managed to get the chickens going. Per Australia's Nine.com.au , the segment is from RTV Noord's Expeditie Grunnen. Mid-interview, the pair begin to laugh and everything just escalates from there. SEE ALSO: Despite health risks, adventurous food lovers are trying raw chicken in Japan In all honesty, this may be the purest video on the internet. WATCH: A farmer's reunion with his animals after Hurricane Harvey will leave you needing tissues Read more... More about Laugh , Culture , Animals , and Web Culture from Mashable http://mashable.com/2017/10/02/chicken-farmer-laughter/?utm_campaign=Mash-Prod-RSS-Feedburner-All-Partial&utm_cid=Mash-Prod-RSS-Feedburner-All-Partial via IFTTT
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