Vassar College's student newspaper of record since 1866
Volume 166 | Issue 4 | September 24, 2026 | miscellanynews.org |
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JULIAN BALSLEY | The union representing Vassar College’s administrative workers appears ready to go on strike as negotiations with the College continue to fall short of a deal. While the College’s collective bargaining agreement with the union, Communications Workers of America Local 1120 (CWA), has a no-strike clause, the agreement’s current extension is set to expire on Sept. 25. If the parties do not agree to another extension by then, the union can strike. |
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Emma Brown/The Miscellany News. |
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SAMUEL EISENBERG | Due to a seemingly high number of fire alarm activations on campus, but few actual fires, students have wondered if Arlington Fire District (AFD) could be growing tired of responding, or potentially not have enough resources to respond to a real fire in the district. “I feel like the fire department just gets here, and then after a while, after so many false flags, I feel like they start to take it a little less serious, too,” said Ryan Santos ’29. |
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Charlotte Willenbring/The Miscellany News. |
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GRACE FINKE | On Sept. 8, OpenAI claimed their software had generated a solution for the Navier-Stokes equations, one of seven Millennium Prize Problems established by the Clay Mathematics Institute (CMI) in May 2000. |
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Aria Kuklinski/The Miscellany News. |
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AURELIA HARRISON | On Friday, Sept. 18, Vassar College Entertainment (ViCE) put on their annual fall concert: They Are Gutting A Body Of Water (TAGABOW) headlined, with support from Vassar student bands Dovetail and Seahorse. Seahorse is a hard-hitting rock outfit composed of vocalist Zoe Rodriguez ’28 [Disclaimer: Rodriguez is Assistant Opinions Editor for The Miscellany News], guitarists Jamie Boland ’29 and Andreas Vavasis ’29, bassist Ameila Khurana ’29 and drummer Levi Rosner ’28. I had the pleasure of sitting down with the band for a post-concert interview, where they gave me some insight into their writing process and main inspirations in the Vassar music scene. Our conversation has been edited for length and clarity. |
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Image courtesy of Miraya Ranawat '29. |
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BRENDAN KENNEDY | Muffled, faint voices appear and fade away. An acoustic guitar plucks a calm melody. And then, a soft intimate voice emerges. beabadoobee opens her fourth studio album with her most gentle imagery of love to date: “And when I’m somewhere / At least we’re connected / Like a pylon on an open road.” Her voice glides over a dreamy, hopeful production—a tender sound that gradually builds into a mesh of electric guitar and atmospheric synths. The lyrics pass between exchanges of lovers finding each other miles apart, her sweet voice flipping between melodies. Then suddenly, the song explodes. |
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EMMA BROWN | Scrolling through social media at 16 years old, Noah Daube-Valois ’28 [Disclaimer: Daube-Valois is Assistant Humor Editor for The Miscellany News] saw an advertisement that would change his life. Northampton, Massachusetts’ Rockridge Retirement Community was looking for local musicians to come perform for its residents. “They were looking for volunteer musicians and I’m always looking for performance experience, so I signed up,” said Daube-Valois. “And I just fell in love with the place and started going there every month to give recitals.” Daube-Valois immediately felt connected to the Rockridge community, noting that its residents were encouraging and accepting of him and his performances, which helped him build confidence as a pianist. |
Noah Daube-Valois/The Miscellany News. |
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JULIAN BALSLEY | The children do not know that they are in immigration court. One of them keeps running around in the background of the Webex screen, then coming up to the screen, where her parents are sitting at the dining room table. Every time the girl comes up to the camera she is smiling—that smile kids have that is almost laughter. |
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OLI PAPE | Carcasses litter the ground. This is the new New York summer, marked by the emergence of the invasive spotted lanternfly, or Lycorma delicatula, which is too lyrical a name to describe such an annoying creature. Spotted lanternflies are a species of planthopper native to parts of East and Southeast Asia, but they first established a population in New York State in 2020. Their main host is the similarly invasive tree of heaven, a stringy deciduous tree slowly taking over the U.S. Northeast, though they will also happily feast on many native trees, like maples and birch trees. |
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Image courtesy of Quinn Stickney '30. |
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ANNA HAGEN | What initially drew me to Pratt House was its silence. As a cozy brick building nestled behind large evergreens, it is the perfect home for the Office of Religious and Spiritual Life and Contemplative Practices (RSLCP). I first stepped into Pratt to check out a morning Buddhist Sangha meditation. I have since become familiar with the heavy presence of quiet in Pratt—a weighted blanket woven of the sounds of nature outside and muffled footsteps. |
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Image courtesy of Reverend Callista Isabelle. |
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LORA JANCZEWSKI | I have been very inspired by the Danish style here; people ooze aura. They wear sunglasses—even in cloudy weather—and lots of bandanas: around the waist like belts and on their heads. People walk in pleated skirts, tailored jorts, wide-barrel jeans. They traverse the old cobblestone streets in ballerina flats or colorful-cool sneakers. I have been silently, and hopefully imperceptibly, staring at them walking past me on the crosswalks or having their morning bolle med ost outside a local cafe. |
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NOAH DAUBE-VALOIS | Last Friday, Amazon announced Prime Day would take place from Oct. 6 to 7. The company released a video previewing the event. “Prime Day isn’t just about customer discounts—it’s about making the world a better place,” said Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos. “That’s why we’re taking the extraordinary step of allowing our delivery drivers to urinate in a restroom once per shift.” Toward the end of the promo, the billionaire apologized to employees who would be excluded from this “once-in-a-lifetime opportunity,” because an “interruption in their work would disrupt global supply chains and bring about Armageddon.” |
Aria Kuklinski/The Miscellany News. |
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ELI BURKE | Dear Deece Fruit Czars, each morning, I anxiously await the selection of fruit that awaits me in that beautiful middle food station island of the Deece. The array of fruits never fails to impress me. The curation is wonderful: a seemingly endless supply of some of the most popular fruits. From pears to apples and everything seedy to the exceptionally moist berries, you guys have outdone yourselves. It would be remiss if I forgot to mention the melon section! It is great how you do not discriminate against your melons. You are right, honeydews and cantaloupes should get equal representation. Even though honeydew is the much less popular melon, it has its own charm, and you have taught me that. Thank you for extending our Vassar education beyond the classroom and into the dining hall. But enough of the pleasantries! I am here to discuss the heartless incident of false advertising I experienced. |
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Charlotte Willenbring/The Miscellany News. |
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ANNA BERGGREN | Little is known of John Bradley, Vassar’s enigmatic First Gentleman, and questions about his true nature have plagued the student body for years. What is his middle name? What is his first name? Could John Bradley beat a horse in a fight? Is John Bradley bothering you? |
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ENDER NIX | I hate generative artificial intelligence (AI). It is the most dangerous piece of modern technology to be created by humans. I know people say that hate is a strong word, but I actually feel like the word “hate” is not strong enough to describe how I feel. I could rattle off synonyms for days, but none of them would ever be able to completely describe the anger that fills me when I think of AI. The worst part is, it seems like not enough people think it is that big of a deal. I know some people who are annoyed by it but reluctantly use it for a recipe or some other thing, like deciding what tile they should use in their new bathroom renovation. The introduction of AI into our society has vitiated us in a plethora of ways—and we must resist using it—or else we will spell out the end of the human race as a whole. |
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Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons. |
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VISHNU LAKSHMAN | As the final weeks of summer drew to a close, the excitement level rose in Flushing Meadows Corona Park in Queens, New York, with the tennis world gearing up for the final Grand Slam of the year: the U.S. Open. As the last weeks of August became the early weeks of September, the tournament progressed from the early rounds with its share of upsets. From Novak Djokovic’s first round loss to Mariano Navone to the final rounds, which brought about some of the most tightly contested games, a historic run and a nearly missed three-peat, the U.S. Open delivered its worth of thrillers that will live in the memories of many for a long time. |
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Aria Kuklinski/The Miscellany News. |
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BENJAMIN KAPLAN | Following the chaotic Week 1, the world turned on their TVs this week to find another baffling and highly entertaining round of football matches. Week 2 began on a Thursday Night Football shootout between the Detroit Lions and the Josh Allen-led Buffalo Bills. Detroit, coming off a disappointing campaign last season and a Week 1 overtime win over the New Orleans Saints, hoped to make a statement this week. That did not happen. |
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Aria Kuklinski/The Miscellany News. |
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ELLEN ZWERLING | Actress Sydney Sweeney faced backlash this past week following her almost completely naked appearance in an advertisement for sports prediction market app Novig, which was released Wednesday, Sept. 9. Prediction markets like Novig are an alternative form of sports betting, in which individuals place bets against one another based on outcomes of future events. The payout of these bets is determined by the supply and demand of the prediction, as outcomes with a higher probability or predicted chance of winning provide a lower payout. Looking to compete with big name prediction market apps like Kalshi and Polymarket, Novig’s controversial advertising campaign skyrocketed its viewership. Sweeney’s campaign, composed of three advertisement videos in total, has amassed 6.7 million views on YouTube. Novig currently sits at #10 in Apple's top downloaded sports apps in the App Store. |
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FROM THE MISCELLANY ARCHIVES |
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From the Sept. 24, 1976, issue |
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BARBARA GOODMAN | Students expressed anger at a controversial admissions pamphlet entitled "Vassar for Men" at a rally held at the Admissions office and at a subsequent town meeting held Sunday night, in which over 600 students participated. The pamphlet, which cited both sports and scholarship statistics to infer that Vassar men were not inferior to the women here, was sent out to guidance counselors and prospective applicants on Tuesday… In a list of demands, and complaints, the 30 organizers of the rally cited the brochure as "sexist," claiming that "it portrays an inaccurate picture of the male students presently at Vassar and discriminates against female students presently at Vassar." |
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